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Why You Need To Stop Seeking Approval Right Now

So it's another New Year, what are you going to do with it? How will you move towards your most vibrant health and life in 2019?

I shared recently how I reflected on my journal last year over the holiday season. It's a powerful fucking thing reading through your daily musings for an entire year, I highly recommend it. One thing I noticed in doing so, was where I let myself down. I'm not sharing that to feel regret or elicit any pity, but to acknowledge it for what it is/was, so I can shift.

You see, I played small many times in pursuing my dreams and visions because I kept seeking approval.

Playing small is the same thing as DOUBTING yourself, your abilities, your gifts and your soul purpose work.

A big lesson I learned, like a hard smack in the face lesson was that I was seeking approval when what I really needed was to give myself permission to BE exactly where I was at and show up as ME. I'm talking about in my work, in my life, in my relationships, with my writing.

I needed to believe in ME. That I already had what it takes to step into my purpose.

Somewhere along the way, some things in my life didn't work out the way I had envisioned and the disillusionment kicked in a bit and I got a little side tracked shifting back. It happens.

But I realized, I was the only person who could move myself back in the right direction. Last year, I saw my approval seeking ways for what they were and I'm here to share with you so you can start to give yourself permission & stop seeking others approval.

I know you have a dream or two, some visions for 2019, things you want to shift in your life. At least I hope you do. And you GET TO have them, but first you have to take ownership and really let yourself believe you can. Do you?

You may realize after reading this that you to have been looking to others to tell you that your behavior or decisions are okay or to give you permission for your actions.

You may find yourself growing impatient with your approval seeking ways and want to take back your power. Perhaps you have taken the initiative to make a major change in your life, and you are second-guessing yourself or seeking other people's approval regarding the choices you've made. That's actually a good thing, it means you recognize it. Now it's time to do something about it! Don't hang out in approval land forever.

Give yourself the vote of confidence you've been looking for and put a stop to your opinion-gathering quest today. Let yourself feel good about your decisions and trust that you know what is right for you. Empower yourself today with your own stamp of approval. BOOM!

When you face choices, the only opinion that truly matters is your own. Yes, it's that fucking simple. You are just making it hard (I know because I've done it too).

While it can be beneficial to bounce ideas and options off of those people in your life whom you trust and who have your best interests in mind, only YOU know enough to make the best possible decision. It is natural to want to seek approval for the choices you make, but any outside support you receive is far outweighed by the approval you give yourself.

Only YOU can possibly know how your choices fit into the grand designs of your destiny and life purpose. Own your choices today and trust yourself, and you will find that the decisions you've made are the right ones for you.


Give yourself permission to dream to tap into your desires to allow yourself to want things and not feel wrong for doing so. Not only are you are allowed to have deep desires you are one hundred percent worthy of them.

Give yourself permission to relax, play, and engage in activities strictly for fun, relaxation, enjoyment and to nurture yourself. Practice monitoring your thoughts and release harsh judgments and negative self-talk with affirmations which will help you to feel good about who you are.

Doubt kills more dreams than anything else (ask me how I know).

You already have everything within you that you need inside of you, learn to tune in, lean in and listen to your heart, your gut. Trust it's voice and if you struggle to do so, get some coaching to help you so you can stop sabotaging yourself. It's important, don't wait, we only have the present to be fully all here so give yourself permission to put yourself on the front burner NOW. No more back burner life for you my dear.

You have a purpose. The world needs YOU to show up and BE in your active purpose. No more shrinking back.


Some of us have a harder time with this than others. For me it stems back to childhood, I never felt worthy, approved of or loved for who I was. I had to work through that as an adult. I saw that it impacted me and decided to do something about it. I shared a little bit about this in other posts around working through limiting beliefs and getting in touch with my inner child.

But here's the big thing, I judged the heck out of myself my whole life because of my early environment and it took a long time to release the judge inside my head. I still have to shift my thoughts many times but it's much easier now that I've done the inner work. No more Judgie McJudger pants (she's not very happy or loving).

So please, for the love of all that is right and good in this world, learn to stop judging yourself!  It holds you back and makes you believe lies and not step into your radiating power. And then the world misses out on all the awesomeness you have to share.

Seeking validation will keep you trapped. You don't need anyone or anything to approve of your worth. When you understand this, you'll be free.

You are already worthy and amazing. Share that shit around. Sparkle and glow!

If you are looking for support with a mentor and coach to empower you further than you can on  your own, so you can radically transform your health & life... I invite you to book a breakthrough session with me.  A breakthrough session is designed to provide you with clarity, confidence and effective tools to move beyond the challenges you are facing (in your health or life) and a simple action plan to follow so you can start creating a life you love.

Now, I'd love to hear from you. Did this post resonate with you? Where have you been seeking approval that you need to give yourself permission? Let me know in the comments.

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